Tobago in solitude

I decided I need some hard-core relaxation (is that a thing?) stat, so I arranged to visit Tobago this week. Alone. This is my first time vacationing solo, but I really just felt the need for some solitude. I staying somewhere safe, taking reasonable precautions ... It's all good, I swear. Anyway, I'm staying at Kariwak Village. My standards have changed since living at St. Dominic's, because I'm super ecstatic over hot water, a decent mattress, and wifi in my room. Don't get me wrong. I love interning at St. Dominic's, but the accommodations aren't what I was used to back home. So this is a nice luxury, to have those things back for a few days. Before I gush more about Kariwak, let me tell you how I felt flying over from Trinidad. ... Well, I'd LIKE to tell you, but I can't quite articulate it. I didn't feel giddy or high on life. But there was a sense of freedom I've never experienced. Flying over the green mountains, then seeing the shoreline of Trinidad, then the open water blending into the sky, soaring in the white, fluffy clouds ... I just felt like I was finally "in charge" of my life. In a "by the grace of God" kind of way, of course. I've often found myself hating being a woman due to the limitations I feel, as for not always feeling safe in the world. And while I will certainly take those precautions I mentioned because I AM a woman travelling alone for a few days ... it's so empowering to believe in my own competence enough to take the risk and just do it. I started thinking, while that plane was in the air, about how all the pain in my life has fueled my determination to transmute the trauma and tragedies in my life into something that can help me and, with this new career in social work, help others. Up in those clouds, I felt more grounded or centered or whatever you want to call it than ever before. Reading back through this, it doesn't adequately explain ... but whatever. I hope you get the gist.

But back to Kariwak. Rather than describe, I'll just post a few pictures. I will add that the live band performing tonight did a reggae version of Knockin' on Heaven's Door that was cool but completely confused me. Also, when I was soaking in the waterfall jacuzzi, I kept moving around to different vantage points trying to figure out which angle had the best view. Quite a problem to have, ent? After I dragged myself out of the water, I relaxed in a hammock for a bit. I realized I was more blissed-out than ever. Lots of firsts today. Again, not a high exactly, as it was calmer, more serene. There was no intensity, which is rare for me, as usually every emotion I feel is amps to 11. I'm just ... good. Oh, and I don't want to leave. Ever. Never, ever, ever, ever. ... Now the pics, no captions, as they're all at Kariwak.

Ariapita Avenue and Oktoberfest

Last night I got a real taste of Trini nightlife. First Jenna and Nakeshia (friends from the office) took me to Shakers on Ariapita Avenue, where Jenna was meeting some folks she knows from Rotary. I had a Tequila Sunrise, Coke, chicken strips, and fried cheese, while the overhead speakers pumped out Aerosmith, Bon Jovi, and GNR. That part was obviously a lot like back home. But we were under a mango tree, and the air was thick with humidity and Caribbean accents. A good rain earlier in the day had cooled down the temp a bit; I'd guess in the 80s.

Jenna, Hope and Nakesia limin' under a mango tree.

We enjoyed each other's company outside Shakers for maybe two hours or more before deciding to check out Oktoberfest just down the avenue -- or up the avenue? The geography still confuses me. On the walk to Oktoberfest, plenty of Trinis were hanging out with open containers. Reminded me of Bourbon Street in NOLA a little. Street vendors were selling cow heel soup and doubles, neither of which I tried. My adventurous spirit doesn't extend to food, as I've mentioned before, I think.

 

Street vendors on Ariapita Avenue.

When we arrived at Oktoberfest, the police made us wait in line for a few minutes before we could enter the dance floor/stage area. Filled to capacity. While we stood in the mud (from the earlier rain), a German entertainer in traditional dress tried to teach the crowd a German dance. The results were quite funny. Soon enough we were allowed entrance, and I got a look at Trinis in German costume. Quite a sight. The crowd attempted yodeling, which didn't work out so well. But shouts of "Wunderbar!" translated well enough, inspiring cheers and drinking all around. I tried a Carib beer, a local brew, just for kicks. I'm not a beer fan, but this wasn't bad. Still, after two careful sips, I passed my cup to Nakeshia, who graciously finished it for me.

Germans and Trinis unite in their appreciation for beer.

After the German portion of the show, Bunji Garlin took the stage. He's an entertainer from Trinidad and Tobago who's been nominated for a Soul Train Award. I enjoyed his stuff, though it's very different from what I usually like. You can't help but dance to it. I felt honored to hear him live. And I felt a wonderful energy as he interacted with all the Trinis who were singing along and dancing. We were on the dance floor maybe an hour and a half, and my feet were aching when they shut down for the night. Gotta take it easy as I'm still getting over ailments. Fortunately my feet are in decent shape this morning, so I didn't overdo. Right now I'm awaiting a ride to the POS airport for a noon flight to Tobago. I'll post more as I visit the sister island.

Bunji Garlin, a much-loved Trini performer.

Marqueripe Bay

My first visit to a Trinidad beach was lovely. It was so beautiful. Comparing it to Destin would be an apples to oranges thing though, so I can't say which is prettier. They're just different. The water was clear, but from a distance looked greenish brown. The sand was full of pebbles, some as big as soft balls. The water wasn't shockingly cool, just pleasant. I went with the kids from St. Dominic's. The boys, in true male style, showed off, splashin' around. On the bus ride over, the girls belted out every word to Trouble by Taylor Swift, and on the way back the boys sang some Bruno Mars. Nice to know America is exporting its finest music. (Ha) Enjoy the photos (taken Oct. 20, 2013).

My first earthquake -- not even kidding

This article tells about the 6.1-magnitude quake I experienced last night. It was my first, and more confusing than scary. I was in the downstairs area of the office building using the internet, on the phone via Skype with my mom, when the building started shaking. I was confused because it wasn't storming, and I associate a shaking house with big thunderboomers. But I realized, no, it wasn't storming. And then the floor moved. I was like, "is that a freakin' EARTHQUAKE?" To mom on the phone, I said something like, "I think we're having an earthquake. Let me call you back." I hung up, and by this point the shaking had stopped. I went upstairs to the convent, where the nuns confirmed that it was indeed an earthquake, a bad one by Trini standards. They asked if it was my first, was I OK. I said yes and yes. I didn't really have time to get scared since my brain wasn't really wrapping around it as it happened. I'm sure if an aftershock had occurred, I'd have been plenty scared. After the one experience, I was like, "Oh my goodness! What if the building structure has been compromised? What if the convent falls into the office? What if they water lines are busted? What if, what if, what if????" Anyway, I calmed myself back down, called to reassure mom, then called my grandparents to say, "Hey, y'all ain't gon' believe what just happened!" They were surprised and worried. Maybe I shouldn't have told them. But I just thought it was cool, in a morbid way, so I wanted to share. It was unique, more than cool, I suppose would be a better way to describe it. Just one more "first" for this trip.

Karaoke, shopping, zoo visit, mid-term evaluation ...

I've been too busy to write much, mostly with internship and seminar obligations. But I have made some time for fun and new friends. A few weeks ago I attended Sr. Debbie's 50th birthday party in South, in the city of San Fernando. I sang karaoke, and Sr. Bernard said she saw me come alive. "That's the real you," she observed.

 At left, Sr. Debbie is amazed at the candles on her cake. At right, Sr. Bernard listens to another partygoer share a story about Sr. Debbie as a youth.

One of the kids there mistook me for a nun, which was quite disconcerting. When I said I wasn't a sister, she assumed I was in training to become a nun. I will burn the dress I was wearing. No, really. ... Anyway, the birthday fete was an all-day affair, with food and karaoke and dancing and libation. Sr. Bernard can really dance.

Another fun outing was today, actually, when I went shopping with my friend Jenna. She's a psychologist at St. Dominic's and is helping train me. She escorted me to town for a retail therapy session, and we further established rapport by trying on dresses, picking out make-up and earrings, and expanding my cultural competence by finding Trini keepsakes I can take home to remember my time here.

Jenna and Hope both love purple.

I got this great batik cushion cover, which I plan to hang when I get home. At first I thought I'd use it in my living room of my future apartment, as it would go well with my yellow chair. But I don't want Lucy and Leon loving on it too much. So a frame seems safer.

This batik cushion cover features the national flower and national bird.

A few days ago I went to the Emperor Valley Zoo. It was fairly small compared to zoos I've visited in the US. There were a couple of animals there I'd never seen before though, so that was very cool. I plan to hit the botanical gardens soon. One of my favorite features of Trinidad is the bright, beautiful flowers.

A Capybara (foreground) and a South American Tapir

As to the reason I'm here ... I'm enjoying the internship, but I had a rough couple of weeks. The chronic stress of getting adjusted to all the new finally got to me, and I got sick for a bit and couldn't work a full week at one point. Sometimes the only way out is through, and I'm definitely through the worst of it all. I did pretty well on my mid-term evaluation and foresee actually managing to pass and graduate as planned. (Yes, I was doubting this, despite the encouragement from other people).

At any rate, all is well now. I aim to enjoy my remaining two months as much as possible without ruining it by second-guessing my competencies all the time. That's the plan, at least. Wish me luck!